Rook meets with Felix about a job. Epi investigates the obelisk. But the real reason you’re listening: Brock files an insurance claim!
Our Cast:
Kenny as the DM
Khadeja as Rook.
Stephanie as Epi.
Paul as Brock.
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Transcript:
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previously on barbra cafe the campaign started with a bang as the bard rock was destroyed in the heat of the moment rook the rogue discovered the object that destroyed the bard rock was some sort of strain obelisk covered in runes brock the bard found strength no one thought he had lifting debris and helping patrons escape the fire epi the acolyte of the raven queen was even able to raise the dead why can’t the clergy heal anymore will brock remain homeless find out today on bard rock cafe
[Music] welcome to episode two we’re gonna start off with brock brock you wake up in the castle district you have guest quarters in the black staffs tower you do roll over and you find kind of perched in your windowsill a very familiar face it’s felix he seems to have been watching you sleep
what are you doing here i was trying to wake you up you are a very heavy sleeper my friend off see t i need t you need t i’m certain that the black staff can accommodate you listen what are you going to do about the bard rock cafe i need it to conduct my business i eat insurance day the gilts fix it oh and i actually get up and try and find like a teapot to pour myself a cup of tea so i can wake up well i don’t know how much experience you have dealing with the guilds but if i were you i would perhaps start with the guild of innkeepers all right i uh do i find my tea kettle or whatever you uh you have only the possessions with you that you had when you left the bard rock cafe all right i uh i’m i uh one of the staff and butter something about tea and then i try and shake myself awake a little bit and i say yeah i i’ll do that i will go see them after i have some breakfast very good and you watch as felix hops out of the window which is remarkable because the guest quarters are on the fourth story i go to the window and look to see if i can see where he went he is in a free fall
he does not seem concerned i watch to see how his landing goes he gets about 10 feet up from the ground and his fall seems to slow dramatically and he just drifts down to the ground on his feet and he just casually strolls away i i golf clap his landing he is four stories down and does not hear your golf clap sir i just pressed the digitation so that he can hear the golf clap at the bottom okay he stops kind of perks his ears up a little bit
and glances over his shoulder and then keeps walking away he seems slightly peeved that you dared watch him fall instead of leave the mystery a mystery you do hear a knock at your door and there is a a young butler with some tea ah thank you i’m sorry i didn’t catch your name sir ah my name is jeeves it’s a pleasure to serve thank you very much jeeps if you need anything else ah please don’t hesitate to make your way down to the first floor cafeteria no uh thank you very much and i pour myself a cup of tea and uh i sit down whatever furniture i have available to me to drink a cup of tea wake up for the morning sure so you have like a little little hotel like single chair and like the tiny table you sit down and you have a cup of tea all right and uh if there if there’s no other uh eventfulness for the morning i’d go grab some breakfast and then head over to the guilds to deal with my insurance okay so you make your way over to the guild hall the fellowship of innkeepers of which you are a member walk in the front door you see a very professional looking gnome filing papers behind a desk that is entirely too big for her uh hello i i think you should have an appointment today uh brock song what uh i’m brock song i’m the owner of the bard rock cafe i i found some papers last night before you all closed about uh my cafe kind of burned down oh the other one from the meteor strike yes yes i heard all about that that sounded so crazy were you inside when it hit yes yes i was i was actually buried in rebel it was quite unpleasant that’s insane i’m so happy you made it out alive i’m so sorry to hear about your inn so you said you had an appointment let me get the book out and like you see her like struggling with a book that’s so like gnomes are three feet tall okay so like she comes up maybe to like your your waist or your thigh and like she’s like trying to push this book up onto the the counter when she climbs but climbs a stool and is standing on top of it opens the book right you said your name is brock’s song rock song brock song brock nope no appointment uh there must be some mistake i found my paperwork is uh is there somebody i can speak to about getting an appointment today uh certainly here is an appointment form and also a request for expedition form you’re going to see two forms it’s like now if you’ll have a seat over there we’ll be right with you as soon as the forms are filled out you’ll just have to get back in line and you do see a line slowly starting to form all right yes i i set the sign and i say uh i am of the water deep songs no no uh you also notice like everybody else in the line kind of gives you the stink eye when you say that uh i’m sorry my home burned down yesterday i’m sorry i’m not not a particularly good mood i apologies and i step aside and go fill up my before one guy this burly looking dude steps up to you and he’s like i have a rat infestation in my cellar and i have been trying to get it taken care of for weeks so excuse me if i don’t have any sympathy for your problems oh i’m so sorry i’m so glad that you at least have a home so congratulations on that he takes a step forward and like he dwarfs you like you have hired muscle he is the muscle he says why don’t you take a seat and fill out your paperwork and then get back in line no i was doing that sir i was just reminding you to count your blessings because you know at the very least you know you do have a home i’m sorry to hear about your rats everyone please calm down i would hate to have someone thrown out and the man just kind of like stiffens and then goes back in line she’s like no no back up the line you lost your spot and like he is now red in the face and makes his way to the back of the line next and like the line continues to move forward as you fill out the paperwork and i fill out the paperwork get back in line okay so roughly 35 minutes later you make your way back up to the front of the line
oh good you’re back did you fill out your paperwork yes it’s right here i think you find everything is in order she checks it over real quick yes everything’s in order all right so here’s the deal we don’t have any appointments um open today so uh i will submit your request for expedition form and we’ll get back to you within one business day about your appointment all right and is there is there any sort of uh like a way i can wait and if there’s any sort of cancellation or if anyone finishes early i can just speak to someone briefly certainly if you would like to take your place over there in the waiting area if there is a cancellation we will put you on our waiting list i thank you very much i appreciate it you know like i have nowhere else to be i lost my home yesterday so i unders i understand i’m so sorry to hear about that i’ll do everything in my power to help you i promise next yeah and without causing any more trouble i just go to wherever he told me to go wait she told me to go wait okay so you will be there for a while yep and also uh unless someone objects otherwise i’m going to just very quietly play a tune on the flute to kind of like hopefully ease the tensions everybody waiting in the line romeo performance
that is a 15 plus uh i so i’m proficient so it is plus five right plus three for my charisma and then plus two for my proficiency that’s correct that’s a dirty 20. okay people seem to appreciate the tune so nobody asks you to stop do i have an eye on the guy who like i royally made mad earlier so he has
made his way off to the side on another end and he has about seven different forms that he is filling out all right uh can i actually uh can i actually i’m gonna say excuse me sir i actually i i’m sorry about earlier but uh i’m actually very familiar with this paperwork if you like i can help you fill some of it out maybe that could speed up your process he kind of stops and he looks you over once real quick make a persuasion roll uh that is a nine plus five is fourteen it says
no we’re fine but uh i’ll do my own paperwork sorry about your house thank you i appreciate it like i said i was just i’m just this is a really emotional state i didn’t mean to cause trouble earlier and you know if you do need help with anything uh you know please feel free to ask and once my cafe is fixed stop by the bard rock cafe and you’ll get your first drink will be on me and i offer him a handshake he kind of there’s this long heavy pause where he’s like right and he does shake your hand and it’s as you would expect it is a very very very strong handshake and then he goes back to doing his forms all right and then i go back to the waiting area satisfied that i have quelled this potential conflict and just go resume playing my flute
okay so epi where did you go for the night where do i normally go for the night do i have like a place i don’t actually know i assume i have a place you typically rent a room from a tavern or an inn uh you don’t have a permanent residence you just have a lot of places that you would go to crash for the night i think i would like to go to a place to crash for the night that is a bit off the beaten path if there is one that is kind of that option sure so you go give me one second you go to a tavern called the mermaid’s arms it is right on the dock line you have a nice view of the ships that are docked at the dock and you crash there over the course of the night i am going to check everything make sure there’s not any like weird crap in my room or people peeping or something then i’m going to take out my little book and start writing in it okay so epi you begin writing in your book i take out just you know regular pen regular quill and i start writing in the book mortimer what in the actual hell just happened there that explosion did not have like anything that felt like an explosion after a moment the ink fades into the page and then reappears with different words i have no idea i’m going to scribble in there
so so do you think if i snuck out i’d be able to get in there and maybe get a look at that thing i i i’m so curious i want to know i imagine the guard probably hasn’t blocked off effie just kind of sits there and thinks for a minute and with a snap of his fingers writes in the book i could use alter self i could look like a member of the guard do you think they’d let me in i think you’re going to try it either way he kind of giggles and writes absolutely and i am going to um fold up my cloak and put it in the bedroll so it looks like there’s someone in there you know arrange the pillows all that good stuff sure and then um i think i’m going to uh quote unquote make my way to a bathroom or just do something where i walk outside for a bit okay i mean nobody really pays you any mind there’s some drunk sailors downstairs perfect and i think uh whenever i am someplace where there aren’t any prying eyes that i can see i think it’d be an excellent time to cast alt herself and you just watch as um this tiefling man enters a back alley and out comes a like 5 11 human man with a beard and you know pale skin brown hair all the good stuff you might mistake this person for a human guard and i make my way back to the bard rock cafe and the city watch does have green and gold as their colors green capes with a gold uh trim around the edge and gold badges that identify them for who they are perfect so you make your way back to the bard rock cafe uh there is you know some light there are some guards posted positioned around they don’t seem to be too worried about keeping people out it is still very early morning so there’s not a whole lot of activity okay i’m going to go walk around towards the back okay are you trying to be stealthy are you just walking over there i am going to just you know regularly walk over there i may nod to the guards kind of you know beyond like oh yeah i’m totally here to cover someone’s shift you know guard knots back doesn’t seem too suspicious once i’m in the back do i see a way in all right so you would know that the bard rock cafe does have a seller there is an entrance to that seller off to the side kind of behind the bushes uh typically it’s locked probably still is right now you also know that there is a giant hole in the floor uh most of the structure itself was burned severely and there’s several you could enter from just about any side at this point is there a particular hole somewhere that doesn’t seem to have anybody looking at it right now you find a hole that seems safe enough to enter not too much trouble okay i’d like to peek inside see if there’s anybody on the inside and if not i’m gonna go in there does seem to be a single magister that is uh looking down into the hole then i think that i’m going to knock and then come in to get the magister’s attention the magister does kind of perk up turns and looks at you and goes um yes what do you need guardsmen i wave and i i walk over and i’m like so sir i was sent to um get a status update have you have you found anything is there anything you would like me to send back in a report he kind of squints at you did you just wave guardsman epi just sort of uh you know he he looks he steps back he’s like my apologies sir salutes all the the normal stuff he has seen the guards do he’s like it’s very early in the morning i am sorry for my familiarity the magister squints even squintier you need a report who is asking for this report happy uh thanks for a minute he’s just like oh goodness i’m so sorry i i started not too long ago but i i’ve just started in the in the castle district i got sent from the black staffs as something about basically the owner he’s a he keeps asking questions something to calm him down i am so sorry i it’s my first day you know i was actually you know i this is this is my first job if you have any recommendations i i just got out of the the training
right and he just kind of rubs his temples look obviously you’re out of your depth here i am here to do magical study i have no interest in how upset the owner of this inn is if he needs calming down rest assured that he will be out of his hair shortly and reconstruction on his cafe can begin very soon now please leave me to my studies if he nods and just kind of goes over to look and he’s like i’ll i’ll try and stay out of your way and can i get a glance down into the hole at all it’s fine if he sees he kind of he he takes a step closer and is squinting right and like right in your face what’s your name guardsman oh um my my apologies sir my name is kevin kevin roll me a deception champion
i’m sure this will be fine oh my god i rolled a 22 with bonuses he there is a heavy pause as he just kind of takes your measure he says kevin yes sir get out right away sir and i i turn and i uh i walk out back to that hole i came in he watches you the whole way and he is it is the suspicion is written all over his face but he’s letting it go did my brief glance in the hole garner any information you uh were not able to get close enough to the hole dang it uh i guess it’s time to look for another uh go check and see if that lock’s still there okay uh you know outside you make your way around nobody pays you much mind you find the stellar entrance it does seem to be locked can i see through a crack at all in the in the cellar doors you want to peek into the cellar door yes okay every single part of the structure is destroyed except this one locked door it’s fine well so the door is on the the doors on the western side of the cafe the meteor hit the eastern half of the cafe so it wasn’t coming from the west it it shot over the door is what i’m guessing has happened yeah yeah so like okay the door is literally in the ground like you open it upwards it’s a cellar door so sure you can peek in go ahead and roll perception uh that’s a solid nine okay so you don’t see anything but you also have a brief flash of self-awareness that you are now a guardsman peeking into a locked door and it does look a little suspicious you do see another one of the guardsmen kind of looking at you and he starts to make his way over to you i stand up at attention i’m like i’m hello georgetown what are you doing here i was i was sent to relieve one of the guardsmen that were here and i’m sorry sir i my curiosity got the better of me are you looking for him through the door guardsman no sir i’m very sorry i just who carter who are you here to relief um i am so sorry i i just started but i believe he was posted at the back i i’m very sorry sir my curiosity got the better of me roll me deception okay shiny dice don’t fail me now okay that is a dirty 20. i rolled a 17. okay the guardsman at the back is guardsmen kevin ah kevin and you see the guardsmen that’s out back behind the the cafe you’re being relieved but i just got here sir i know guardsman yes sir he’s talking to you now effie what is your name my name is kevin but it is spelled with a y
wow that’s crazy i know right it’s the kevin squad look look protecting the city you rely on kevin you hear the most world-weary sigh from the other guardsmen
says this reeks of a mix-up at the station kevin you’re free to go kevin take kevin’s spot yes sir i’m going to have a drink and he makes his way back to his post excellent i’m going to go relieve kevin of his post what is kevin’s post he is behind the cafe you saw him when you were creeping around fair enough good this lasts up to an hour [Laughter] it did take you about 15 minutes to get here so you do still have the bulk of that time left is there anything i can really see from the back at my new kevin post you see the remains of the bard rock cafe uh you do you are able to make your way to that opening in the back and see inside but again you can’t really see down in the hole fair enough are there any other guards posted out back just you okay okay i think i’m gonna stay there for you know you know i gotta i gotta do right by kevin i’m going to stay there at my post uh can i ask a question sure so where are the guards going to the bathroom since i imagine the chamber pot area in the bard rock is not in good condition and how like she’s got 45 minutes maybe the guy watching the hole just needs to hit the head at some point so water deep does have public restrooms they are every once in a while but it’s basically like little stations because water deep does have a sewer and working plumbing but also it has been less than an hour and these are guardsmen but so you’re holding this post for how long effie um i’m gonna stick around for you know at least 30 minutes seeing if there’s any opportunity for me to you know maybe go back by that door again without anyone getting too suspicious but we’ll see we’ll see what people do in those 30 minutes okay about 20 minutes in uh you hear the magister make his way out the what’s what’s left of the front door and he says i need to get into the cellar can you open the door for
and me the guard that you talked with earlier go yes yes come on making their way around to the side and you hear the rattle of the chain as it is unlocked and the cellar door is open excellent i think now would be a very good time is there anybody in within seeing distance of me that could see what i’m doing role perception
so that’s an 11 plus 2 a solid 13.
you don’t see anybody okay i think i am going to uh use the bathroom quote-unquote
okay and uh once i uh go to the bathroom to relieve myself i think it’s time to uh find a familiar to help me out oh okay that’s a long casting time
there’s a casting time of one hour yeah i will let you do it you will just be occupying that public restroom for a considerable time i think um i may go with a slightly different approach i would like to um okay so the thing about it is um alter stealth self is concentration so would i be able to cast another spell while maintaining that so long as it is not also a concentration spell perfect i think it’s time to pull out that little bit of wood with the the string that’s just tied around it i whisper a few words and you watch the string coil back up and um using my lovely little telepathic connection with my unseen servant i think i’m going to have him walk in after them if it’s still open sure okay i’d like to send my unseen servant down there okay uh where are you while your servant is going down still in the bathroom or you come back to your post i think i should come back to my post you know just so i can be close within 60 feet of my uncertainty scenes perfect uh and what is your servant ordered to do he is ordered if at all possible to prop the door open after they leave or unlock it from the inside okay so he is able to do so roll me a d-100 oh boy i get the first one you do okay okay here we go here we go
72 i think things are about to get a little wild in here yes all right so you now have five unseen servants four of them are going in random directions and you seem to have no control over what they do
i’m sure it’s fine are they about to run into anything and or anyone well they’re unseen so you don’t know fair enough do you wait i think um let’s see if at all possible since you know i’m having a bit of an unseen problem here uh before i get back to my post let’s see okay good it’s a bonus action so i saw in to the cellar when i peeked in right yeah you saw the stairs leading down uh perhaps it’s time to um before i do that i’m going to tell my unseen servant to open and slam the door to the seller okay he does so you also notice about 20 feet off to the side the door to one of the local shops is now opening and slamming as well the front door of the bard rock cafe is also opening and slamming shut the door to one of the residents houses is rattling violently and you notice directly in front of you the restroom’s door is opening and slamming shut i’m gonna try and hide my grin while the magistrate decides to figure out what what’s happening oh yeah so everybody’s on high alert right now all right what’s going on the magistrate says someone’s using magic and you see that he has well actually no you don’t you don’t see [ __ ] he’s in the cellar but he says someone has cast magic fan out and find whoever’s around here i am going to join them and fanning out okay uh the door in front of you is opening and slamming shut i am going to um or i’m going to tell one of the guards you go go tell them that um that this door is enchanted too i’m going to go check by my post make sure there’s nothing going on and i’m going to get out of the back towards the oh i’m still in the bathroom oh god oh yes you said you were still in there that’s true i am still in the bathroom i’m going to tell er is anybody you know i assume people are looking at the bathroom oh yeah they’re looking at all the doors that are opening and shutting and you feel you feel one of your invisible servants or unseen servants dissipate oh i am going to tell the one that is by the magistrate trip him it’s gone oh crap i’m going to tell one of my other ones to trip the magistrate yeah to trip the magistrate the doors in unison stop opening and shutting as all four remaining unseen servants make their way to the magistrate i’m sure this will be fine i’m going to get out of the bathroom in a bolt and be like did you see that what’s going on that’s like i don’t know what’s happening i don’t know man they didn’t cover this in basic i just want to say really quick they didn’t cover it in basic but they probably did cover it in c plus
that was terrible and i loved it
you see four magical bolts fly out of the cellar and strike each of your unseen servants and they all poof out of existence and the magistrate comes up his spell book is out he has a crystal orb in his hand and he’s looking around saying all right something’s going on and he stops and he looks dead at you i’ll fan out sir and i’m booking it stop him he cast magic and all the guards are now chasing you uh i am going to be like i am going to be like i’m going to turn around and look behind me i’ll get him for you sir and i’m booking it okay uh yeah okay uh roll you just sprinting down the street yeah or i’m trying to sprint you know and look in alleyways or run into an alleyway if i see anything quote unquote okay so you’re running away you hear the guards running after you you hear whistles now as they are chasing you okay and they heard me hang on answered by whistles further down the street and then even further away to get the sense that the city guard know that someone is being chased right now did it look like they were buying it and don’t think they were buying it not even a little bit excellent i’m just going to be like all right you got me and i am going to just snap my fingers and silver mist is going to envelop me and i’m going to poof away as best i can okay where do you poof away too where is the okay so it was a place i could see right yes are any of them still in the cellar no they’re all out of the cellar do i remember the stairs i saw in the cellar and does that count for this i’ll allow it excellent you poop onto the stairs yes okay roll me a stealth chick oh boy i’m sure this will be fun all right tiny dice i believe in you tiny guys you’ve got this tiny pink dice okay so that is a 15 plus a one that’s a 16. okay i also need another d100 roll oh boy
this is gonna be fun that’s a solid 40. okay choose another location within 30 feet another location within 30 feet yes you are on the stairs in the cellar choose another location that you can see within 30 feet is there any place in there that looks extremely well hidden like people couldn’t see it or something like i’m in there for three seconds what do i see rubble you see barrels of whiskey you see wine racks you see that you do see the obelisk now which probably catches your eye more than anything else well i think i may uh have to teleport to the obelisk okay you are now directly next to the obelisk okay and since everyone is looking for kevin with a y i’m dropping alt herself okay sure the moment they don’t seem to be looking in the ceiling excellent what can i see for this brief moment in the cellar you see the obelisk with the pointed top pierced three feet into the ground you see that it is made of what looks to be obsidian there are deep cracks all through it and there are slightly glowing golden symbols or writing or something all around not the base but the pointed part of it that goes up can i read it what languages do you speak common infernal and abyssal you cannot dang uh from my quick studies what like you know this was clearly magic i’m going i’m going to write the the symbols into my book as quickly as i can as best i can how long do you spend doing this i’m going to kind of keep an eye out on the door but i’m going to write as many as i can before i think they’re heading back towards the cellar because i gotta hide if they you have about a good 20 to 30 seconds and then you see a guard you see that someone has made their way to the entrance of the cellar and is coming down okay it is time to hide i am dressed entirely in black maybe i can hide behind one of these giant wine barrels and nobody will see me because i’m not that big in my real form roll a stealth check okay okay okay okay
gold dice you’re up
okay 15 plus 1 is 16. okay we’ll come back to you
so rook yes where did where did you crash for the night rook decided to crash at the brothel where her mom used to work she’d never want to admit it even to the women inside but seeing that cafe in flames kind of did end up freaking her out a little bit okay so she stayed the night and uh woke up groggy the next morning
okay so as you make your way out first thing in the morning okay i say first thing when about do you think rook would wake up roku wake up rook is not an early riser rook does things at night most of the time so almost afternoon morning okay so you make your way out uh you’re still in the docks district
there is a town crier in a square that is just down the road he has some interesting things to say i’m listening the gods are silent clerics lose their casting the faithful are losing faith all clerics everywhere no healing no resurrection no amount of offering seems to get the attention of the gods what could be happening no one knows the open lord has begun an open investigation into the cause of this then after that a meteor has struck in the dox district obliterating the bard rock cafe officials have yet to give a statement but vajra safar the black staff was cited personally investigating no word yet on how many casualties or if there are any survivors and then moving on the traitor saren is still at large an open bounty has been given for his arrest dead or alive and he goes on and he keeps talking about the news of the day autuex have gotten loose in the sewers people are encouraged to limit their waste and water usage in the lower docks district a bounty is posted for any who would deal with that problem and he goes on healing supplies going missing as clerics are unable to perform their spells healing potions and healing supplies are in now high demand anyone with extra is encouraged to report to the nearest temple you will be compensated and he starts to repeat what he said rook thinks to herself i have two ways of doing things i can try and see if i could take care of a sewer problem not really the type of thing that rook likes to do or i could try and help with medical supplies i mean someone’s gonna want me to go get some for them i should probably talk to felix and so rook thinks about it for a second also she did notice that the crier said no survivors which is realized very pathetic for rook because well here she was right there um but she didn’t feel like correcting anybody so just a quick note i don’t know if i made a mistake it was no word on survivors or casualties okay so rook just still doesn’t feel like giving anyone the word or telling anybody anything about anything brooke would rather go about her business or try to take her mind off of what happened yesterday honestly or maybe take advantage of it so she wonders where felix is today is it possible for me to track him like would i know where he is so felix to the best of your recollection took up the black staff on her offer of housing people in the castle district and you imagine he would probably be at the black staffs tower somewhere black staff’s tower that’s an interesting place i might you know it’s interesting for many reasons i might as well make my way over there is the castle district easy to get into for anybody it is more heavily guarded being as how that is where the actual barracks for the city are but it’s not restricted travel you can get there this is the government district there’s not a whole lot of citizenry there rook just wants to get in there uh inconspicuously so she’s just gonna try and walk through the least guarded entrance to the castle district okay i mean there’s an entrance to the castle district not too too far from the bard rock cafe it does actually rub up against the docks district so you said it’s near the bar draw cafe as well you can you can get there from the bard rock cafe so i think it might be so if that’s the case rook will take a look at what the cafe looks like for a sec before making her way on to the castle district so at your point in the day uh the guards have been increased a little bit from an event that happened the previous night but it’s it’s pretty destroyed is there so um is this before or after eppy’s adventure so you’re seeing the results several hours after effie’s adventure okay i thought so okay um besides seeing a lot of guards is there like anything happening like other people going inside like going in and out of the rubble or anything like that from the outside you can’t see anything happening there may be some people inside you don’t know okay okay yeah i remember that crack that i snuck into so i just kind of want to go to the same area and look through and see if i can see anything okay there are two guards in the back um how um i was wondering if there’s a way i could stealth but if they’re like right in front of it that’s really not possible um let me think they have all entrances pretty well covered there are at least two guards at every potential entry into the bardrock cafe could try to draw them away with something or anything but you don’t think that straight stealthing your way in is going to work as it’s just streets all around yeah rook’s thinking is there really anything she wants to see inside that she hasn’t seen already she’s not that sure so i think rook’s gonna move on to the castle district okay run into no problems uh as you’re moving away from the entrance to the castle district into the district itself you do go ahead and roll a perception check i want to see 17 total uh you do not see felix as he falls in step right behind you okay says rook welcome i was hoping you’d track me down today brooke turns around sup how are you feeling day after our eventful encounter alive it’s a start you i’m having a great day my primary place of business is now rubble i am housed at the black staffs tower which has a lot of tempting targets but also mages and guards everywhere i was hoping you might do me some favors pricey favors you know i always pay i have to make sure though what do you need well let me put a pause on this let me wrap up effie’s thing real quick then we’ll come back to this yeah all right so effie yep for the duration of the night there is going to be someone in this cellar that you are hiding in that’s understandable what do you do so from my vantage point behind the giant wine barrels am i able to see the obelisk at all or am i pretty well hidden so that nobody can see me a yes to both if at all possible i’m going to i’m going to draw it out and write as many of the symbols as i can see from my little vantage point okay this could not have gone better from ebby’s point of view sure and i am probably going to wait and see if um if any or i’m assuming if somebody leaves go to the bathroom somebody else comes to relieve them so there’s never a moment where i’m just by myself yeah no you’re not going to be by yourself for a while fair enough so i think for now they haven’t caught me and they don’t know i’m down there but should they get a little bit too much on my scent i’m thinking that might be time to use thaumaturgy did anybody find me i’m assuming after several hours they may have oh boy oh boy all right so the magister comes back and is investigating this obelisk romeo d6 okay we got a solid three okay so all around the magister sand starts to appear just sand and he tries to uh figure out what’s happening but the sand keeps spawning and after like about 15-20 seconds there’s like a lot of sand and it’s not stopping
so the magister he starts to like try to figure out what’s going on he’s freaking out the guard’s freaking out what’s going on i don’t know i just cast detect magic and this happened he tries to to like walk away from the sand the sand is spawning from around him he’s having a hard time walking because again it’s sand tries to walk up the steps but he slips and falls into the sand uh the guard kind of pulls him up out of it but now the guard’s getting sand all around his feet uh he says get me out of here come on we’ve gotta go uh and yeah you watch as they get out of the cellar there’s sand everywhere now like there’s a lot of sand you just watched like 30 seconds and there’s now like a foot and a half of sand leading up to that part of the cellar and out but there’s for for the moment that’s a lot of sand for the moment it’s just you okay i’m going to peek out for just a moment is there another way out that is not the sand covered corridor there is the hole directly above you that is the only way out besides the door to the cellar okay i think it’s time for the front door of the bard rock cafe to get thaumaturgied so it starts slamming open and shut okay so the front door of the bard rock cafe is opening and shutting the guards are now looking at that and at the they’re distracted by the magister who is still spawning sand outside the bard rock cafe which brooke you would have seen random sand everywhere that would have would have struck you as odd you’re not really near a beach excellent and i am going to because i can sit several times i’m going to have for my instantaneous sound somewhere off in the direction very far from the cellar door the voice of kevin say i’m back the magister stops and perks up as sand starts to fill up around him he’s here get him he’s doing this to me and they all start running towards where the sound originated excellent i am going to in my sneakiest sneakiest way see if i can get away roll stealth an advantage because everyone is distracted okay sparkly tiny black glitter dice has rolled a 15 for the first one and a two for the second one so uh with my slight hand bonus or my stealth bonus of one i rolled a whopping 16. okay uh you successfully get away from the bard rock cafe and epi goes back to the
to the mermaid’s arms with just the smuggest cat who ate the canary look on his face okay appropriate because curiosity is going to be what gets epi killed it looks like absolutely
all right so rock yes i don’t know not rook brock oh sorry i wasn’t sure if i heard that correctly either hey i’m back yeah so you wait about four hours and then the little gnome lady comes over there’s been a cancellation if you would like to be seen now yes yes please i’d very much like to be seen now right uh so just go up to the second story uh go talk to the man named philip he is the first door on the right is one of our claim violence do i know philip already have i previously met philip you’d have no clue who this is okay all right so i go up there and i thank the person uh thank you very much i appreciate your time yes of course have a seat so how can i help you today
uh well uh you might have heard about the incident that happened at the bard rock cafe yesterday well i’m the proprietor and i’m here to claim my insurance ah yes that is a very unfortunate occurrence never had a meteor strike in the city before to my knowledge anyway and he pulls out this massive file that is your file i’ve taken the liberty of looking through it really quickly it does look like you have all of your paperwork in order from the creation of this cafe you have registered with all of the appropriate guilds you are insured and it pulls out your insurance copy which is about 10 pages long alright so i have here our section uh you are a member of our guild so you are covered i have gone ahead and applied my seal i just need you to sign right here let me hand you one of the pins can i just roll investigation to read it over first to make sure that there’s nothing that will surprise me sure go ahead i rolled a whopping three plus one four everything seems in order awesome so i go ahead and i sign my seal on that bad boy i assume that i still have like a noble seal would go with my noble birth sure uh and that does give him just the briefest pause he’s like wonderful mr song all right now here is where things get a little aggravating and i do apologize for this because so many different guilds are involved in the upkeep and maintenance of your particular cafe i am going to need you to go to all of them get them to notarize and sign their portion of this insurance contract so you’ll see that next on our list we do have the order of locksmiths and blacksmiths uh they are up in the nobles district uh and he gives you an address i will need you to go there next all right now is it possible for me to uh have an agent go in my place or do i have to personally appear at all of these oh no you are the policy holder no one can act in your place that is unheard of especially because you have a noble seal we have so many scam artists i would hate for you to be presumed as one of those and run into any of that hairiness no i i completely understand i just know that you know a lot of times you know my family we had people to take care of paperwork so i wasn’t sure if this is one of those situations but it’s fine you know i can actually help you with that so i can happily give power of attorney to someone of your choosing we just do have to go over a few tiny paperwork issues first all right and he’s pulling out the biggest file you’ve ever seen all right i’ve got i want to roll i want to roll uh perception to get an idea if it will take me longer to go through this that would be just do all the legwork myself go ahead and roll that is a seven plus perception is wisdom right yes plus zero you are fairly certain this is going to be a headache no matter what way you go about it all right yeah uh sure do i need the uh person here now to go through it my power of attorney person uh that would be preferable as they also have to sign all of this all right uh do you do we have somebody we can send i want to get my uh i want to get my friend melody to come here and where is she uh she’s housed in the doc’s district uh near the bard rock but a safe distance away i understand all right so what i have here is a form allowing us to act on your behalf as your messenger he slides across like a 10 page form we’re going to have to go over some details for it yep uh are you ready yes okay he begins going over the form in excruciating detail giving one of their runners permission to deliver a message and retrieve your friend all right fantastic and i just i listen intently uh you know i’m used to this kind of stuff from when i was more on top of my noble duties so i knew this i knew to a degree this paperwork’s gonna be a headache anyway so after about another 40 45 minutes they said the runner out he says all right so they’ll be back within one business day with your friend it’s unreasonable to expect them to just come here after all uh so if you would please make your way back downstairs to the waiting area and when your friend arrives please get back in line all right no problem you said you said that we can expect to do things with her tomorrow can i just schedule the appointment for tomorrow for all three of us then
certainly here is our appointment scheduling form if you could please just fill this out and turn it into the front desk thank you all right fantastic thank you so much you’ve been a big help i try have a lovely day yep and so i uh go downstairs fill out the paperwork because there’s some right to positive if it goes to the line to deposit the appointment form oh yeah you have to go back to the line yeah that i figured as much and do i see my big buddy from earlier down is he still here oh yeah he’s still here all right how’s he doing he is currently he is in line with more papers somehow now you do also see rook and felix sitting in the waiting area and felix is staring right at you so rook yes felix tells you
i have a strange sense that our friend is not going to have the easiest time getting the bard rock cafe rebuilt by legal means huh so i was going to offer to to finance it myself what i would like from you if you’re willing work with him to help pay off the loan i do have some jobs lined up that you and him together might be able to work on assuming he takes my offer oh you want me to work with someone think of it as guarding an investment not that i think he would run off i know where he lives but it’s alone you used to live i want the cafe back up too i guess i can help temporarily of course think of it as a favor to me sure all right come along then let me lead you you guys are waiting the entire 45 minutes that brock is up there trying in vain to get something done so brought you right how far away from my friend my beefy friend in line am i i you’re pretty close to the back right now he’s about halfway up the line okay all right so i can’t smart conversation with him no and all right if i’m very close to the back i actually i’m not worried about my spot because i’ve already lost most of my day and i can leave once i file this paperwork so i can check in with you too brock having a productive day uh it’s not it’s not unproductive what have you accomplished uh the first of approximately 20 forms to get the bard rock refilled well that’s that’s five percent of what i was hoping to accomplish today so that’s something
this is unfortunately the ugly side of working with the guilds they are good for what they do but when it comes time for them to pay up they’re not very helpful i’d like to offer you a different more expedient solution i’m listening
you know what i do for a living you know who i am yes you sell cat goods yes yes and it’s a very lucrative cat goods business i would like to offer you a loan by my estimation the bard rock will take about 12 to 13 000 gold to rebuild i am happy to loan you that if you’re willing to pay me back by doing odd jobs around town i have a few and i know there’s going to be work this is waterdeep after all
it seems more expedient for everyone and i have a personal vested interest in our relationship continuing
uh sounds good and i’m sure you know regardless of when the loan gets paid off uh once my i i’ll have them take care of the paperwork for me here and i’m sure they’ll reimburse me for some of the work as long as we use the guilds for the repairs oh yes don’t worry about that so that it sounds like a win-win but i i do have one odd job i’d like to volunteer for if uh if it lines up to your interest it probably won’t pay much but uh i i really feel for somebody else who is here today oh and i kind of gesture over to a big guy apparently he has a rat problem uh that probably would only take me uh take me and uh and maybe a couple of friends we can round up you know at night to fit and take care of i think we can probably kill some rats oh certainly ah i recognize him he works at the general good store poor fellow that’s going to be in the southern district
i’ll tell you what i have one other person i’d like to round up just to make sure that everyone is working together towards the same goals his name is epi epimetheus the raven queens cleric that raised the man yesterday i have a feeling that it’s in everyone’s interest to keep close tabs on that one too i don’t know if you’ve heard but the clerics have lost their spell casting i did hear but not a prometheus [Laughter] i have a vested interest in knowing what’s going on there and i was able to heal with magic as well so it seems it’s only the clerics and it’s not actually healing magic indeed curious that the gods have gone silent so let’s round up epimetheus and then i can direct you all to the general good store where their rat problem is happening i’m sure they’d be happy to have your assistance all right and i that sounds good and then i approach my uh my friend and say uh hey uh tell you what i i actually have a lot of free time how would you like it if i took care of your rap problem uh listen i’m just the gopher uh if you if you want to take care of that go pay a visit to the store uh he hands you a flyer and on the flyer it says the general’s general good store for all your general needs and it has an address in the southern district it says just tell them that that frederick sent you and they’ll they’ll set you on the right path all right thank you it’s been a pleasure meeting you today frederick and i hold out my hand shaking to him one more time all right he shakes your hand again yeah uh he has he’s like i gotta spend the rest of my day here this is my job today yep i i understand having spent most of the day here myself i completely understand best of luck to you you as well oh i’m just gonna say can i use my thieves cant to ask him if i should follow brock or just ask him straight up should i follow him twitch felix says sure let’s all go together it’s a fun little adventure and that’s where we’ll end episode 2. we all make mistakes spending too much on inkeepers insurance doesn’t have to be one of them did your tavern get pillaged by pirates maybe your inn was ransacked by bandits maybe your cafe was struck by a natural disaster no problem join the innkeepers guild today filing claim is quick simple and easy 15 hours can save you 15 or more on your end repairs
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