Bard Rock Cafe Episode 8: Faerun Prison Blues

After being arrested, the party fights to escape. Brock starts acting strangely.

Our Cast:

Kenny as the DM

Khadeja as Rook

Stephanie as Epi

Paul as Brock

Tyler as Armbar

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previously on bar rock cafe the party tried to trick the guards and escape but the magister saw right through their deception and they were captured rook’s job went off with barely a hitch as she stole a report from the obelisk for evilex only to find out the party got arrested can rook save them before things get any worse find out today on barb rock cafe

today we’re gonna stage a jailbreak we’re not staying down we found ourselves in a real frail state and we can’t stick around i hate to burst our bubble it will be hard to break free we need to get out of trouble it’s time to escape and flee

all right welcome back everybody to episode eight where we left off brooke and felix were coming to intervene with the party as they were stuck in jail so what would you all like to do now that you are in jail it’s been about 10 minutes nobody’s coming to check on you armbar uh effie

yeah as far as you are aware no one is coming to help what do you do all right uh so brock would like to start by using presta digitation to create a feather okay yep so i create the feather and i just set that aside for now and i presume i still have pockets they didn’t trip me naked [Music] all right awesome then i my plan is contingent on a guard appearing so i’m waiting to see if guards check on us anytime in the near future so i’m done with my planning for now i have the feather okay thinking of a lack of guards are there still no guards around so this guard outpost is partitioned into two areas there’s the front area where the guards stay there’s usually about four of them that’s where like the armory evidence containment that sort of thing is and then the back which is just the cells so you do you know that the guards are in the other half of the building they’re still like it’s not a huge structure it’s an outpost all right now quick question you did establish last time is eight cells in like basically a straight line we’re all facing like a blank wall basically right yes so we would have seen what order we were put in the cells because theoretically one of us gets put in a cell they walk further down so do we have a rough idea where we each are in relation to each other yes so based on how you guys walked in you basically started at the leftmost cell and started working your way down it went armbar effie rock and then the thux all right so armbar has the cell closest to where the guards are uh farthest actually farthest okay because it’s think of it like a not necessarily a t structure but the door leading out is right in the middle so cells four and five would be closest okay all right so the guards come in and they’re basically in the center of the block i got you yes so i’m actually closest to the guards that the three of us think yes if it’s a t then yeah probably yeah if it’s a t and you’re furthest that means i’m the closest to the guard entrance all right so do we do we have any idea like we’ve been here about 10 minutes without the guards coming back to check on us yes okay so there’s no one there that would see me do anything right correct i would like since i still have my good old alter self up to see if i cannot uh morph my form again this time into the magister that you know took us here but i would like to see if i can’t make my wrists and hands small enough to pull out of the shackles okay so you are able to make your arms a little smaller you did not make yourself significantly larger when you did alt yourself the first time changed into a butler you have like like there’s effie’s wrists and then there’s like arm bars you know for like armbar just has arms that are as big as your head pop eye arms right and then there’s effort

right so you stayed you even stated that you stayed roughly the same size so you can go a little smaller but not much so you have a little give in the shackles right now i’ll let you go ahead and roll sleight of hand if you want to try to pull your your hands out and we’ll see what you roll and go from there okay i’m gonna break out mammoth dice this time

the guns i rolled a 12 plus a one is a solid 13. but it doesn’t seem like the shackles are going to come off your wrists there’s a little more give you’ve got a little further but they’re definitely still tight enough that not able to just slip out okay then i am going to go up during this 10 minute period to the bars can i look through or around to see who’s in the cell next to me and or stick my little tiny hands through and kind of like motion to other cells by getting right up on the wall you can stick your hands out of the cell you can’t really see that well like the bars are not wide enough for you to stick your head out so all you really have a view of is the stone wall opposite of it now can epi see my hands because i was tapping my manacles on the bars last time playing a song when we left can effie see my hands playing my song no you guys are perfectly right next to each other with stonewall like if you stuck your hands all the way out near the edge where every cell starts then enemy would be able to see your hands does that make sense yeah but because of the angles involved you don’t have a whole lot of horizontal view between cells okay but i’m gonna i have two things i want to try first a [ __ ] was i able to sneak in any of my sleeve diamonds can i rule for that where would you hit me in my sleeves okay how well i guess is the question right so the guards would have shook all of you down before putting you in so which is why they have all your component pouches they’re knocked up go ahead and roll sleight of hand to see if you can keep at least one diamond somewhere they don’t find okay this might be a high safe but i’m gonna try for it [Music] yeah that’s a that’s a two why couldn’t it have been a one true i know but it was a two plus a one is a solid three so yeah no they found sleep diamonds they definitely found all of your diamonds take it now did they successfully confiscate armbar’s muscles [Music] armbar does not remember any surgery being done so all right all right guys cockating arm bars fantastic muscles i have an idea oh my god and he summons scrozzle and match the two alpacas [Laughter] where would you like to summon them we’re gonna i think they’re gonna summon on the outside of this of myself and then i’m gonna have that i’m gonna have like a tie tie their uh their harnesses to the cell cage and then all at once we’re gonna try to rip the bars off so did i hear this i’m assuming i heard armbar just loudly yell some in his alpacas well you would also see two alpacas you were gonna see them all right awesome i i know whatever he’s doing i throw a particular inspiration at it okay so just stick your thumb over the bars yeah we’re gonna get out of here and you’re excited tapping you gave him a part of inspiration the tapping was everything it gave me that spark of inspiration all right so i automatically got out of this right so you have your two alpacas are you just relying on the alpacas or are you trying to break the bars as well i’m gonna help i’m gonna be pushing it as hard as i can so what i’d like you to do i’d like you to roll three athletics tricks all right one for each alpaca and one can i also rage oh yeah absolutely tyler you gotta announce your roll numbers for the audience oh well i gotta figure out which one because i just kind of like threw all three so if i go with if i go if i go with a 10 for scruzzle a 17 for natch and a 24 for armbar for the advantage throw then that’ll then that’ll probably be the best out of that all right now hang on because i’m looking at roll 20 at your rolls you said what were they now if i’m adding four to the six on the first one

that six already has five added to it uh he’s talking about inspiration oh those are [ __ ] are you kidding me okay so those are not ones buddy all right so that’s that one is a nat one and then the other the other the other two can be so it’d be a 16 for natch a one a nat one for skruzzle and a 24 for armbar the skruzzle trigger wild magic yes this is either gonna be magnificent or awful yeah go ahead and roll tv 84 and 88 papa needs a new pair of shoes

armbar they took your shoes those fiends took the slippers right off my feetsies i may be unpushed to talk but she got me laughing while i was drinking again

gosh dang it you said your rolls are what now 84 and 88. okay so a few things happen no good things good things good things [Music] as you look at your tattoo the tattoo fades and is replaced on your left shoulder with a stylized gl okay and a few cells down here what the hell why the [ __ ] do i have a llama attack [Laughter] it’s an alpaca honey oh becca you messed it up again and you’re miss me young man scruzzle and natch are now responding to the new owner of your tattoo that’s after they pulled though right do what now that’s after they pulled though because it resulted from the check right yes so between despite the net one you armbar rolled really well the bars break your cell door is open oh yeah

so you are still shackled this was not a stealthy uh event you know you just snapped metal all right so i’m sorry i was just going to say now that armbar has given up any chance of us having a stealthy way out i want to do what i made my feather for but if that’s all right i want to do a thing too after a feather feather i want to use the feather as the component to cast enhance ability and give myself uh i forget what the strength one is called i have my cards right here i think a strength of bear bowl strength yeah i’m gonna give myself bowl strength if that’s all right all right i’ll allow it and then i want to do a strength check to try and break out of my shackles other shackles okay and hopefully i also want to make the argument that one of the reasons i was playing music on was to try and wear them out to like ding them up i okay i already have advantage on the strength check i just want to make a point of saying that sure go ahead and roll 16 minus one so 15. and 14 minus 1 is 13. so 15 is the higher roll okay that’s not going to be enough i straightened myself really hard why am i not strong i’m gonna see him struggle and i’m going to help him by pulling on the cage okay well so real quick happy what were you doing so since we’re going with loud and everything going crazy i think it would be a great time to cast thaumaturgy which only requires a verbal component and cause harmless trimmers in the ground make everything kind of seem earthquaky okay so some dust falls from the ceiling as the building just rattles a little bit struggle and match go down to their

you go first tyler oh i was like what you think you’re gonna hurt my feelings i’m getting my tattoo back

and while i see armbar going past i am going to run up to the to the bar and just be like if they ask why oh hang on if they ask why you’re out tell them it was the earthquake or tell them the loma guys from you it’s an ill breaker [Laughter] and so as as you guys are doing this because the guards heard all this they’re on it the door flies open all four guards are right there they come pouring in and stop as they see two alpacas inside the building they have not seen alpacas come through the building there is no other exit from this part of the building and they see that roland armbar is also out of this cell and i have a question i have a question too okay did i trigger wild magic when i did my enhance ability

i just remembered i cast a spell the magister i have plans for after a while oh i i tracked the wild magic yeah you you triggered wild magic all right let me just make sure i have the 10 and not the 12 okay if i have a double zero that is i have eight and a double zero is that two oh oh double zero is the ones or the the ten slots so you rolled an eight okay so i will let you know basically the next time somebody uses bardic inspiration roll a one to d4 first and i’ll tell you what happened okay all right so if the guards are confused i what happened when uh i was helping brock like arnold was trying to help brock open up this wall you wouldn’t have had time okay all right this happened there was a noise the guards are immediately coming in so at this point we’re going in rounds gonna run it i’m gonna run it like it’s y’all’s turn and then just the guard’s turn just for simplicity okay all right and i want to stay for the record that i look like i’m getting really angry trying to break out of my shackles and failing so you have some veins holding in your neck and nothing’s really happening yeah and i look like the magister and i have a plan you go first tyler i was gonna try to deceive the guards and ex and explain i’ll just do it if i if i can before we go to turns in case something changes well so the guards are coming in here they see you out of your cell they now have their clubs drawn they are shouting at you too basically to get back to the back of yourself where are they in relation to myself uh well they’re now they are going to be moving in front of your cell as they go towards arm bar all right and is is arm bar in front of epi seller mine i would say in front of episode now just because you’re planning to help i have to help you okay so i guess yeah all right all right i have an action i’d like to do if it’s still our quote turn well it is now so uh okay i got one too all right uh all right do you wanna okay what order are we gonna do this that’s what i was gonna say uh go ahead each of you roll the initiative just so i know which order you were going i wrote the 14. i got 13. yeah all right you know the drill tyler did he roll a natural 20 oh yeah so do you get anything really natural 20 initiative it’s still in that 20. no i’m just asking if there’s a benefit to doing it if it’s a waste of a natural 20. i’m i’m waiting to click my double 100 rolls

48 and 96. let’s go oh wow all right so these are both kind of neutral which one would you like uh 48 48 okay so the guards look at you they are all all four of them immediately intimidated by you yeah but that’s natural right like that’s not because your natural intimidation has been dialed up to 2011

as of right now they are all affected by the frightened condition which means they cannot move towards you basically and they have disadvantage on attacks against so i can i can talk i can like say something right now yeah like you are definitely going first i’m gonna say something right now to those guards if you’re if you’re allowing me or if we gotta do a different turn well it is your turn okay you you definitely see like they’re scared of you and speaking is a free action yes within reason okay four score and seven years ago i’m just gonna go on a break here you better open up these simple doors or i’ll leave the smackdown on your brother intimidation with advantage you said sorry i was calling oh yeah i got a 20 if uh for the chat a dirty 20. good old dirty 20s dirty 20 so go ahead and roll me at d100 you need to calm down sir 32. this is quite great 32. i’m going to rage no one’s gonna stop me


[Laughter] so because of the nature of this role nothing happens it just fizzles but you did trigger wild magic so one of the guards uh you see a wet patch start to appear on his trousers one of the other ones just starts to book it out of the room however that well okay you get the sense that they are going to respond on their turn how about that yeah okay brock what would you like to do unless there’s more that roland would like to do i’m gonna move uh move past him to the guy who’s attracting my alpacas okay you’re gonna you’re oh so you’re running into them i’m gonna go back past them they’re gonna well i’m assuming that they’re gonna get out of my way because they’re afraid of me i think they have to run away from you they don’t have to run away they cannot move towards and then they have disadvantage on attack i like how armbar is so dedicated to these alpacas he’s just gonna ignore the actual danger of the situation he’s i told them to open up your cells like you’re fine they’re not doing it though it’s not their turn yet yeah it’s not their turn so you move over to the closest cell that has one of the thugs in it and he’s looking at like this alpaca tattoo he’s like what why i don’t understand you don’t need to understand all right you just give me back my own pec attempt to or i won’t clobber you he looks over at you sees his tattoo on your shoulder what’s going on i don’t understand i like i don’t you you don’t need to understand just get your body over here as i beckon him towards the edge of the cell okay so he’ll move to the back of the cell and be like let me out then we’ll talk oh i can leave you in here and then you don’t get your gl tattoo back you don’t even know what that is don’t care and he’s clearly a fan of the green lantern listen buddy if you don’t get over here right now when i open up this cell you’re gonna get pounded okay uh i’ll give you one last chance well i would say that would take your turn okay uh what would you like to do now did any of the guards indicate that they’re going to let us out so i’ll let you roll an inside check for that all right 16 and insight is to do i’m looking for my plus or minus plus 0 16. they’re pretty terrified do you think their goal in life at this point is to not have to fight this guy that’s what i want all right then i’m just going to try and break out of my shackles again okay go ahead

19 so 18 after my modifier 18 was what you were looking for all right so i just rip those shackles off like i’m doing a big bicep curl and the chain just pops in the middle right yeah so it takes you like it’s not it still takes you pull it but yeah you snap the chains on your shackles

let us out yeah and you can tell by the sound of brock’s voice that is not brock’s voice anymore okay so breaking the shackles was an action would you like to would you like to move or use a bonus i well i’m still in a cell so moving seems kind of arbitrary i’m gonna stay more or less like within five feet of my cell bar so that i’m not pressed up against it but i would not be reading attack i’m not in melee range through the bars okay okay so seeing as how i look like the magistrate and all that good stuff i am going to come to the bars and in my best and well in my magistrate voice because ultra self will let you do that i’m going to get up there and say there is wild magic going on and i have been switched with this person you get me out of here this instant and can i use my bonus action to give epi my last part of inspiration i’ll allow it all out and that is i believe i should have had three for the day and that is three okay go ahead if you want to at the world reception that you have apart of inspiration whenever you want to use it but there is some sort of hidden side effect of using it that you don’t know about any character but out of character you do okay so what was that okay okay i’m i’m rolling shiny dice so that was a three my deception modifier is a three and i’m using that bardic inspiration because i do not know any better roll with d4 first hey that’s a four cool all right roll the d6 it’s a d6 right a d6 for parting inspiration oh i thought that’s what the d4 she rolled was for the v4 would determine a wild magic effect i so of all the things i forgot to put on my character sheet i forgot the bass bardic inspiration i have all the extra font inspiration okay now back i forgot to put actual bass baseline bark inspiration on my notes but i think you can look up bardic inspiration in rule 20 maybe i got a four so three plus three plus four we got what i roll add another four yes okay so eight plus six i hope that’s enough to deceive them i i do look like the magistrates that is that is some math and magic right there uh none of them seem particularly what’s the word i’m looking for disease insightful right now as they are all terrified and focused elsewhere so 14 words yeah as best you can tell at this point armbar what’s

both of your alpacas start to attack you not scrozling match one of them hits you for five bludgeoning damage i’m raging by the way one of them hits you for two bludgeoning damage

as the guards two of them just book it they’re gone they have left one has soiled himself the one with the keys is now moving very quickly to unlock starting with effie and make his way down so happy the shell door is unlocked can i hold out the shackles and just kind of look at them expectingly

and he does the same for brock’s cell door starts making his way to the first he starts to make his way towards the first cell with a thug in it and he stops because armbar is right there in front of that silver rook yes as you and felix are casing this place looking at you know this is the jail cell where your friends are being held see two guards just sprinting out the front they look terrified well that looks very interesting doesn’t it it’s always interesting with you all of you we might not need to intervene but let’s see what’s going on sounds good so you have a turn right now what would you like to do with it okay so um i just want to know exactly where i am so you are about 10 feet away from the entrance across the street you see the guards running out the front door and just okay um i want to try and find a better entrance than the front door um do i see any windows i can crawl into from the side or the back of the building so from the best you can tell from this vantage point there are windows near the front the windows on the back each cell has a narrow horizontal window it is too small for you to crawl through it’s like about three inches by a foot right there so it’s a male slot yeah it is enough to let light in but the goal is and it’s also not at like ground level it’s up near the top of the cell so that it’s hard for you to get to in case you wanted to slide something in okay i think what i’m going to do because i don’t know i mean i saw those two guards were outside maybe there aren’t that many left inside so i’ll just take a look uh try to get our best look through a window into this building okay so the windows are open it’s the middle of the day you see nobody inside you see the door to the back is open okay so there’s nobody inside in the front area um i’m gonna be careful about it but i’m gonna enter the building um and get to the door to the back okay so when you say you’re being careful what do you mean oh uh i’ll say i’ll stealth i’ll stealth in go ahead and hold stealth check yeah that’s a 17 total okay if you believe you are stealthy you make your way in it’s standard guard house as you get inside you do see into the back room looks kind of chaotic at the moment you see the scene you see the two alpacas that are attacking armbar you see the cell doors are open you see one of the guards paralyzed with fear the other one is wrestling with he needs to open the cell door but he is terrified of our bar not willing to move closer to him that’s what you see so just to clarify the things that are attacking the actual attackers are the alpacas right now yes okay um i’ve never done this before i’m going to try oh man i don’t know what it does for i want to try and like wrangle one of the alpacas with rope cause i have tons of rope in my bag okay go ahead and just roll me a straight deck stage now this will be your action the stealthing was a bonus action okay whoever invented animal handling is so sad right now my outf 12 total i don’t know what the heck this is so if you are not proficient with broken

[Music] okay so you have successfully wrangled one of the alpacas but you have no clue what to do with it now oh okay so like a dog that catches its tail the rope is around it and now you’re sitting here like uh i didn’t think i’d get this far

rook sits there stunned so following an immediate moment where you feel like a complete badass yeah oh yeah oh well rook that’s too bad girl okay all right arm bar it is your turn you’ve seen all this happen what do you do i’m ripping the door down you are still raging because you did take damage go ahead and roll athletics at advantage 11 that’s not gonna do it oh wait it plus two for rage that’s still not gonna do it it was an 18 to break my shackles and you need you had 24 and help from an alpaca and you broke the first door down that’s correct you know you have a guy who’s scared of you with keys right can i can i ask him to throw me the key so i can open the door certainly try hey you over there give me your key now oh god it tosses you the keys we thank you you’re a nice guy you’re welcome let’s get out of here oh god

i’m opening the door so once your item interacts you open the door you use your action to try to just pull it off the hinges okay i’m just gonna stand in the middle of the cell door so he can’t the guy the guy can not get around me he’s it’s a five foot door like you know you have to move through that square to get past so yeah you are imposing yourself in the door guys at the back of his cell uh brock your turn i don’t know all right so the guard that i just gave the keys away just book it out here with the other two so there’s just one guard left is that what the situation is it’s not his turn okay he was well it looks like he’s going to most you got was oh god okay all right just checking i thought you said he booked it all right so what i want to do is uh the other where’s the other guard right now by the entrance and as you look over there you do see you catch a glimpse of there’s rook wrangling one of the alpacas he’s trying to you know where is the chest with our stuff it is in the other side of the boat so do i have to get past do i have to get past this guy to get to it yes all right uh is he looking at me right now he is pretty focused on our bar all right so i want to sneak up on him and put him in a stranglehold okay so you could stealth or you could grapple which would you like uh well i i want a stealth and then if i get him and then if i hopefully if i pass stealth otherwise i’m going to rush him and put him in a grapple hold if he looks at me but basically that’s my plan is to use my movement in stealth to get up close enough to him to grapple and then i want to try putting him in a grapple hold so what i’m saying is action it is an action to stealth and an action to grapple okay uh fine i’m just gonna rush him and grapple okay so athletics athletics now do i have advantage on that because i have enhanced ability on still actually yes you would okay that was my hope so first roll is on a corner of all things didn’t i rolled into the other dice first roll is a seven minus one is six second roll is a three minus one is two so i just run up to him and i’m guessing i don’t successfully grapple him at all well he rolled

you have him in a chokehold what do you do i want to uh i want to use the rest of my movement to drag him back to my cell and then try and shove them and lock the door okay so you do have them grappled so you can do that you all out you now have the guard inside the cell and you should stop the door and it locks because yeah that’s how cell doors work so yeah one of the guards is now locked up itself and then i say rook get our uh rook get our weapons out of the uh out of that chest out there i’m sorry rook get our weapons out of the chest out there forgot i forgot i have to use the other voice rook will do anything except sit and defeat as she is doing right now well first epi yes it is your turn okay so the only guard that was still there is currently behind a cell door right there were two guards still there the one guard lets you out and unlock your shackles and he’s still like in front of your cell door the other guard was paralyzed by the exit and brock has now trapped him inside his cell and there is the alpacas and rook and the rest of this chaos but yeah there’s the guard that tossed the keys is still in front of yourself basically okay since i am still the magistrate i gotta also i do think it’s magister i think there’s a difference it is magister a magistrate oh like a gym yeah i’m the lady with the spells so as lady with spells i am going to um make a break for the door and i’m going to tell him get out of here get out of here and go get help later you know run out [Music] you know what can i just say uh no i have an idea hang on can i amend my decision i’ll allow it i was thinking out loud no no it’s not you i had an idea i have all ears i’m still gonna make a break for the door but i’m gonna tell him run and hide i’ll take care of this oh god [Music] [Laughter] yeah go hide in that cell

you know that wouldn’t be a bad idea so all right so you look you just make a book for it uh well i’m making a book towards that front room because i still don’t have any of my spell components right i’m going to make a break quote-unquote towards rook quote-unquote for the chest

so you’re you’re making your way you can’t really get through the door because there’s alpacas and rook and rope and it’s like it’s crowded right now there’s this is not a large space and there’s a lot of physical stuff in the way like there’s two alpacas these are horse-sized creatures in games turn this is difficult terrain fair enough so if that’s the case do i still have an action technically you do like think about you’re in a stable with two horses you’re in like a stall in a stable with two horses and two people at you like it’s it is crowded and movement is hard because everything else is moving and there’s rope involved it’s yeah so what do you do i think now would be a great time to slap one of the alpacas on the on the rump with a good old shocking grasp see if i can’t get it to run which one the one that’s between me and the chest i put this way the one that’s roped to rook or the other one that was yeah tangled everywhere yeah i was like are you gonna send rook on a ride are you attacking the other one [Laughter] jeez can i hold perception to see if i noticed [Music]

on one end of this rope is an alpaca and at the other end of the rope your friends is your teenage friend rook who has no idea what she’s doing oh man she just wanted to get one all back out of the way it didn’t work sounds like a good time next time a carrot would do [Laughter] oh my gosh seems like a um a good time to cast shocking grasp on the one that is not attached to my teenage friend okay what are the components for shopping grass um a preacher you try to touch rebel and somatic um verbal and somatic is what i was looking for because it’s just a cantrip right well some hand trips do have components this one that is partly why i was reading through all of them right so yeah rolling attack okay

does it 26 5 hit yeah that hits i slap it real good on the wrong was that what was that a modified before it was modified what was that dice roll 19. okay i have a plus six to my spell attack bonuses because that’s a smart little the number was high enough i was like wait did that start at 20. nope we’re good all right so roll damage

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so you give it a spicy slap and that’s about it it uh doesn’t seem to react the way you imagine an alpaca should react well it’s got all that that wool it’s got all that wool shock absorber yeah it’s used to getting shocked electrically from all that electricity it’s fine am i able to get through the door after shocking the alpaca i’m gonna say no the alpacas are still very much in the way i if you really really want to try i’ll let you roll acrobatics and we’ll see how it goes yeah i i want to see effie try and cart and cartwheel over this okay all right guys for for running over the alpacas ketchup dice or catch your face guys the ketchup dice doesn’t let you down this many times ketchup dice it is it’s probably you can do it that’s probably fine what could go wrong hmm all right 12 plus one it’s a 13. it’s a roll that is a holy average roll middle of the road all right so what’s your armor class oh no so i’m a wizard uh-huh so not much is it 11

how much damage do i take all right so you take eight damage as one of the alpacas kicks you while you run by all right go ahead and roll concentration for me oh i haven’t done that before hang on it’s a d20 plus your concept okay boy am i glad i put a bunch of stuff in the con all right hot pink dice come on baby make up for what ketchup dice messed up that’s an 11 plus 3 is a 14. okay you do not drop alter yourself from that one oh thank god okay take nine damage roll concentration

okay i officially do not like these alpacas that one kicked me in the head and it looks like i’m doing pretty bad but do you maintain concentration on ultrasound i you know what time for biggie dice biggie dice i believe in you [ __ ] you biggie dice three plus three is a six so yeah uh the spell fizzles you lose all yourself you are now epic the godive is my back to the to the guard yeah no the guard’s not looking at you they’re still focused on this terrifying pile of muscle known as armbar you are past the alpacas you are into the other half of the outpost okay is there anybody there nope excellent are there any keys additional keys i will let you roll a perception check and that’s going to be the end of your turn okay so we’re going we’re going with red dice on this one okay red dice is pulling through we got a 16 plus two so that’s an 18. uh you do see an empty key rack dang it so there’s no more keys dang it can i reaction say something make it quick okay i’m just gonna whisper back grab the keys okay i think armor already has the keys so it is the thug’s turn all right what did you say your armor class was 14 14 okay so you take i’m sorry against the four yeah you take eight reduce the four bludgeoning as one of your alpacas kicks you and then nine reduce the forward bludgeoning as the other alpaca kicks you okay um they are magically compelled to follow the orders of their master oh interesting duly noted the thug in the cell now that his cell door is open he’s going to charge you he’s going to try and knock you over he is bull rushing so i need you to roll either athletics or acrobatics your choice i rolled the 24 he rolled a 5. [Laughter] give him the clothesline

he runs into you and it’s akin to running into a brick wall with padding on the side of it and he just sort of bounces harmlessly off that’s the champ sweet father he just like he knew you were strong he sees he’s not fly he didn’t realize he just sort of like he’s there he is in front of you you are now engaged with this guy the other two thugs are going to try why are they attacking me wait wait thugs wait we only we opened the doors of more thugs i thought everyone else was still in their cells they are okay that doesn’t mean they’re not doing anything okay so they try and fail to break their shackles the other guard runs into eppy’s cell and locks himself in he is now cowering in the back corner trying to stay out of the way so at this point the cars are all effectively out of the fight it is now just the alpacas and the thugs versus you guys can i speak as a free action yes but it is now rook’s turn uh you can go ahead if you want to say something right go ahead hey all of you the guards are out of the way why are we fighting amongst ourselves how about we let you out you just help us get out of here tell that to your big beefy friend i am champ he’ll we will figure out how to get your tattoo back stop fighting with the guy you could snap in half i know you want to literally rip his arm off to get the tattoo back but we’re gonna just do let’s get out of here first let me just do my thing boss it’s all a mask all right if if we let you out let me just ask you man if we let you out will you come with us to figure out how to get my friend’s tattoo back so as you guys are going back and forth this is a good bit of talking what would you like to do you have a wrangled alpaca in a very enclosed space am i like blocked from like can i get to this chest because i heard brock asked me to get to it so can i see it oh yeah you see it it’s okay it’s the evidence chest right right so if i can see it let me just you know what that alpaca thing was but a dream so brooke will uh just go right to the chest and uh check if it’s locked uh it’s locked all right so time for me to use my lock picking kit is that straight up what role is that these tools are their own check aren’t they well so it is because you are proficient it is dexterity plus your proficiency bonus plus your g20 rule

wait a minute oh okay so d okay so it’s plus six let me ask you this was it one of your expertise options yes okay i’m not yeah i i do have expertise and these tools was one of the ones you picked yes okay so go ahead and roll a g20 okay i got 10. okay so what’s your dexterity modifier it’s four okay so that’s 14. and then your proficiency bonus at level three is plus two yep i got that over there that’s sixteen then you add plus two again for expertise so i got my eighteen yep six thanks that is exactly the dc to unlock the chest oh my god thank god okay so like you’re just doing what you do every day you just slide them in click click click the lock comes undone the chest is open you see everybody’s stuff you’re stuck well not your stuff but the party stuff the thugs their stuff all of it okay um do i have any more actions uh that was your action you can use a bonus action for one of your rogues things

we’re actually trying to like not fight i think they’re the alpacas aren’t trained on me or anything so i don’t need to disengage from them i guess i’ll just uh you already so you had it lassoed you were about 10 feet away you were never engaged with it i was never engaged with it yeah so i mean let me where’s brock at right now brock is from your perspective he is inside the room off the left uh i don’t want to get inside the room more that sucks okay okay i think i’m just going to stay out of sight here um but i’m going to i’m going to signal to brock to look at me and i’m gonna say brock i took care of it well so you actually you know where brock is you actually can’t see brock because there’s oh the other side of like well i yelled it okay um go ahead and roll me at d100 please sure 54. cool for the rest of the day you are proficient with all tools sick can you just go make us some beer really quick so yeah herbalism kid poisoners tools forgery all that just are proficient with all of them for the rest of the day okay you feel a surge of knowledge and insight you’re flush with the possibilities all right okay our bar finally all right this is this is armbar i don’t think you know who you’re messing with there little man oh yeah but i’m rolling the armbar and i don’t know what you did but you don’t took my help from me and that’s not kosher you got it punk so you’re gonna give them back see and i know you’re the one making them attack me think you’re dumb guy huh we’ll take this and he’s gonna reach down at his [ __ ] stamp and rip it off your tearing off the tattoo i’m going to tear off his skin he’s trying to rip off the other guy’s tattoo i’m going to rip off his tattoo oh my god all right uh i don’t really know what to roll for that go ahead straight a gratuitous gore check please right so let’s this is going to be a couple of things let’s start with the grapple check so just straight athletics 17. okay so grappling roll sleight of hand what’s the opposite of sleight because that’s what this is with your strength instead of your dexterity as the modifier oh six plus four three so nine so i mean you’re clawing at the tattoo you have this guy gripped right he’s wearing shackles he’s not going anywhere but you’re not you’re trying to tear his skin off you’re not like getting enough grip to do that give me back my tip too you punk like what the what yeah yeah this isn’t going anywhere and i push him aside

i didn’t take your tattoos you took my tattoo liar i know you’re kind you trying to steal champ wild magic oh yeah you do have a point there boss sorry buddy excuse my friend he’s incredibly violent and incredibly uh not intelligent no offense champ i like him let’s get out of here all right all right if if i call him off will you just like work with us to get out of here yeah champion play off of him uh alpacas please stop kicking the champ so you see the guy kind of motion to the alpacas and the alpacas stand down and then they dissipate into the tattoo again the rope that was lasting one of them falls gently to the ground all right does everyone else also want to get out yes champ let him loose i toss him down you are you tossing the keys to me or you’re just gonna open the keys well the keys are in the door but who are you tossing the keys to oh i just met the guy oh yeah here for your buddies all right so at this point combat’s over uh tattoos are staying where they’re at for now you don’t know how long that’s going to stay but the guy lets himself out of his shackles releases his buddies they’re all out you notice they all have well the other two have that gl tattoo on their left shoulder do we know what that means i haven’t seen it before i would like to dive into the chest at my earliest convenience get my my book and my diamonds and all the other yes i would also like my things back so in a just a couple of minutes you’re able to to get all your stuff back and distribute it the way it’s supposed to be you all have your things and i pull my hood up over my head okay and i’m just going to be like we should probably go before anybody else gets here i don’t think those other two are going to be afraid for very long um actually that magister saw my face she needs to die interesting one moment i’ll take care of it and i run over to the desk is there paper there yeah okay i’m grabbing a pin and i’m gonna write charms a hell of a spell sincerely yours kevin and i spell it with a y slam it down all right all right it’s taken care of let’s go i believe in being thorough so we’re still gonna kill the manchester right that’ll that will explain i want we’re gonna put kevin with a y to this everywhere but i but that magister lied to us i don’t think she was gonna be lenient with us she saw my face she knows my name i’m making sure she never speaks my name to anyone are you sure so the thug with the alpaca tattoos he puts his hand on your shoulder we’re gonna get along just fine you and me thanks what’s your name pal my name is beryl nice to meet you what was that what was his name barrel b-e-r-r-y-l barrel okay by the chance of your friend’s name lock and shock what do you think try to be funny no that was that was paul asking i switched out a character voice for that one i actually have a character voice going today his name is beryl the alpaca steeler he didn’t do it on purpose all right so we have two guards locked away i think that they’re scared enough they just aren’t gonna talk so i think we just need to deal with this one magister and we’re good you’re awfully violent today let’s talk about that on the way and epi is just inching towards the door like gotta go we gotta go can i would like to roll intimidation on epi okay [ __ ] do it we’re staying here i rolled uh an 11 plus 3 14. heavy roller wisdom savings goddamn metal dice oh sweetie that’s a dirty 20. okay so you’re not intimidated but you’re definitely seeing that there is a level of intensity here that has not been here before i would like to cast a spell as a reaction well all right sure if they’re if you’re okay with that well i mean not as a reaction you’re just casting a spell oh yeah i would like to cast charm person on our good friend bro all right just so you know i do have advantage on that because i am because i am a kaleshtar oh that’s fine that’s fine i don’t know that yet yep just letting you know i’m also letting the listeners at home know we’re all the same first one was 18 plus zero so 18. second one was a four so 18. you are not charged and you do know that you were the charm was attempted i would like to attempt an unarmed strike on epi okay i have two hp this is gonna go great roll the attack it is just a d20 plus your strength modifier four so three oh thank god i swing i pull like a big hail maker and i swing and i and i missed by like inches and i play it off like next time i won’t miss you didn’t take into account how short i am did you barrel steps between the two of you buddies friends we’re wasting time that’s just gonna be here soon and well i think we need to send the message anyway i’m down for killing today i was supposed to get on that boat but i get the sense that you were too no hard feelings some positivity might come out of this stilts after all i’m always up for making new friends effie if you don’t want to be a part of this you can leave now but you’re not going to stop me is just looking between the two of them and just kind of gives them a look and can i actually just like give like a description of my expression here yeah epic can see a look in brock’s eyes they’ve never seen before not like just fire or murder like it looks like a different person you’re looking into the mind and soul of somebody you’ve never seen before hmm i’m gonna nod just be like all right all right there’s no convincing you i think i’m gonna wait outside and i’m going to go outside as epi and kind of um go towards the end of the street and i’m going to keep an eye out for that magister rook how do you feel about this plan

you can also leave if you’re not okay with it it’s not really in the cards it wasn’t really what i came here for that’s fine thank you for your help she knows my name she knows my face i can’t take that risk mean i think it’s a little extreme buddy and a piece i guess i mean i’m pissing out and for half a second rook sees brock’s eyes and not the eyes of whatever this is so do i know what the heck that means no you just know i was acting like a different person for half a second you saw the person you know like you said something that triggered it but like it wasn’t enough

so does rook leave yeah rook leaves thinking armbar what’s that you’re the only one left [Music] it’s me and who it’s the two of us and the thugs well brock you always knew i got your back brother okay can i actually can armbar roll a history check to see if he remembers me ever doing this because armbar is the only person who’s known me well enough long enough to be able to actually know this would he have seen this before uh he probably would have if he saw me get really mad oh so i just know yeah if well that’s why you’re asking if you can roll a history check to see if you remember it like do you remember ever seeing me get like this blood boiling out of control mad before i’m not gonna make a roll of history jake uh just just either no or you don’t that’s like yeah so that’s a decision for tyler then tyler do you think that you’ve ever seen me like this that’s your character choice and if it is you do recognize me for this for what it is all right listen bronk i’ve known you for a long time but i can never see that i’ve seen you in this light before you’re acting pretty original you’re very intelligent man and that’s why like you’re calculated and you do what’s right in your heart and your soul and i don’t think that those two things are properly aligned i don’t think this is a good idea man i think we need to recalculate what we gonna do come back to this another time another place another galaxy the stars in space brock shakes his head for a second like he’s like coming out of a daze uh kenny just left i don’t know what a good check for this would be what what should you think we should do instead i don’t want this magister coming for me none of the rest of you they don’t know their your names they know my name well come we don’t know where this manchester is we need to find out more about this jabroni and then bring him to justice that we don’t need you we’ll take them out another time all right so at this point in the recording kenny’s away i think i’m my guess is i’m supposed to probably roll a check to see whether or not you persuaded me because i think that’s where it is right now is can you persuade brock to calm down yeah but i’m not the dm so i can’t come up with another plan i mean if you wanna like if you i think that what we should do is i should roll like wisdom versus you rolling persuasion do we want to wait for him for a couple seconds right that’s right yeah that’s what i’m that’s what i’m thinking we have to do i’m just like i’m waiting for kenny to be back to do things like he left her in the middle of our heartfelt moment here all right so anyway kenny said he’s back so armbar said some stuff that uh armbar said some stuff i think would persuade brock so i think at this point i need to decide whether it’s whether or not brock is persuaded because it’s not brock at the steering wheel so i was how do you think we should best resolve that what is your what’s what is your wisdom modifier plus zero okay so you roll an eye roll all right i rolled an eight okay and then uh i have advantage if it’s a saving throw okay 11. so it’s tied i guess we’ll roll off again all right as armbar you’re watching like an internal struggle happen okay i have seven and then with advantage a two so seven okay well i roll the natural twine oh [ __ ]

and so you see the light come back in brock’s eyes and go what happened oh god please tell me i didn’t do anything unforgivable right buddy everything’s fine you just said some things you didn’t mean i think your friends understood uh we’ll get back to that so we’re out of the cell that’s a good thing i have my stuff back also a good thing um a hi i i feel like i don’t need a barrel right i don’t know why i know your name but i know it yes my name is the little pig pleasure to re-meet you long story uh can someone get me up to speed and can we just do like a jump cut to after everyone explains to me all the stuff that happened like armbar explains me what happened so i can make a decision so first the guy’s like right anyway i don’t know what just happened are we doing this thing or not uh doing what thing kill the magister oh she does know my name huh um yeah so i’m so so despite what you might have learned in the last 10 minutes i’m actually kind of like a pacifist you know that’s not the vibe you were giving off like five minutes ago you had we had some really great energy going and yeah i feel like so so like here’s the thing i have no problem with you killing the magister i just i could not do it it would make me sick to my stomach i i would take a long time to explain to you and i feel like we either need to mobilize a plan or leave so you were literally just saying let’s kill the magister she’s seen my face and now you’re saying right i don’t

roland’s getting in the middle of this listen buster you just lay off and skadale before we have another easter hold on champ i’m okay with him killing the magister because i don’t want her

so here’s what i think i want to do i want to actually give me a second here what i’m going to do is how about i give help you guys out so that you’re equipped to do it but then i want to just book it is that okay like we can go off for support and if anything goes south we’ll be outside offering support for you guys all right so what i can do is i’m actually i’ve forgotten out of support i’m out of all my high level support spells and stuff so what we’ll do is we’ll stand sentinel and if she goes and she has any help we’ll come back from the back and take care of them so you guys stay here set up the ambush we’ll go outside and we will stand outside and if she brings any reinforcements we’ll help clip them from the back sounds good all right and so i i will leave armbar out of here now so brooke and tapping obviously they do seem i’m guessing you guys would try to reconnect yep yeah we go outside immediately look for where our friends are stationed i’m guessing they didn’t make themselves so hidden we wouldn’t be able to find them or that they would like flag us down when they see us coming out

is not um i’m gonna kind of i i probably went down to the end of the street just to keep an eye out for the magister but actually he’s gonna get a message in her ear that just says what was that all about yeah i was actually gonna rook was planning on following you and asking um how long have you known this brock guy or did you do did you mean at the same time i did well i’ve been going to the to the bard rocks for a while now but i really only know him as the owner right because i’ve known well not really known it but i kind of know him and i’ve never seen him like that yeah this is new i mean it’ll support the liar left behind but i’m just gonna have to tell the manchester not to go in there i can’t let him do that to himself he’s not going to win she’s look look i’m i’m experienced with spells i don’t think she’s going to be a cakewalk for anybody to defeat and no offense to brock but i don’t know if he’s on her level yet uh i have to agree with you on that one i don’t know if he’s really gonna go through with it because i don’t know him that well so i hope not but if nothing else maybe i can convince the lady not to go in let’s find out to be fair i might have lived a little bit of a life you know if she thinks it wasn’t him doing it he was uh charmed in some way yeah he can’t be held accountable for his actions solid bets if he doesn’t try and [ __ ] kill her i’m gonna beat that i will gently remind you that you are actually still charmed by the magister it hasn’t been like an hour yet no oh that’s true i’m just gonna be like oh that’s why you don’t want me to kill her and he’s just gonna lead over and he’s just like i’m between the two of us really i’ve known some some magisters in my time she’s really nice she’s i i really believe she was going to let this off easy i don’t i don’t think it’s a good idea i think she’s a good lady just you know my impression of her rook hold up her hands i don’t know that’s fair that’s better but still we can’t let him just get murdered she’s just doing her job can can you see if someone is charmed just that’s a question i’ve always wanted so the thing is you really don’t know effie that well right so it would normally be an insight check

yeah if the person’s like acting a little fun like a little fishy like no you wouldn’t be buddy buddy with a master but you don’t know that because you don’t really know and there’s no like glazed over thing in the eye or anything like there’s no like i don’t have not even with like disadvantages like she’s perfectly okay with the person like she thinks that the person who just arrested her is a great person i i’ll tell you what i’ll let you roll inside against the magister’s spell save dc at disadvantage okay

i’m also surprised getting their head kicked in didn’t this break that charm spell i don’t expect uh rook to be particularly uh good at figuring this out my disadvantage is a seven seems like effie is sincere that his magister seemed on the level well brooke’s thinking maybe epi thinks the magister’s pretty or something rook can’t remember what the magister even looks like well technically rook hasn’t met this magic trick that checks out okay there you go

so do we see the magister at all not before rock and arm bar would come out of this sounds cool cool cool so do i see brock and armbar coming up i am going if i’m able to shoot a message at armbar and say i i don’t know what’s going on but we need to get out of here and to enter anything that’s not the street grab them and go i’m with you what do you mean

what do you mean by that

i’m gonna just kind of go send message again i mean if we’re not out of here in time we’re probably going to wind up back in those cells and we probably shouldn’t take the streets to do it okay so as you’re doing the second message spell they have met you guys so like you finish the message spell and then you turn around and there’s armbar like literally right there okay what do you mean epi we’re ready to go let’s let’s head out send me messages forward effie just kind of pinches his nose and he’s like all right edwards it works let’s go well i admit i told them we’d support them at least in fighting the magister we didn’t have to actually do it ourselves can we like at least take out the situation and see what happens rookie you know somewhere we might be able to watch this safely from a distance from a distance uh unless they’re fighting in the front room ain’t gonna see much right just whether let’s go in the building like the magistrate comes back in force i don’t want them to get slaughtered either from what i hear according to this one she’s a tough cookie yeah can i i was there when eppie got charmed can i roll inside to see if i know ep is charmed yes i’ll even let you do it neutral i roll a 12 and insight is intelligence plus 1 13. that’s still not enough maybe i’m partial to it

come on do it hard do i get to do everything in this group

i just

come on roll that sweet 18. what am i rolling uh enrolling inside


42 and 29. to be fair that’s the one time you’ve gotten a barbarian like roll on something that barbarians shouldn’t be good at yeah that’s the first time ever all right so armbar’s not just bad at reading he’s bad at reading people except for my buddy brock yeah actually armbar you are now colorblind everything in the world is black white shades of bridge hey that’s great that was terrible and i’m proud of you and it was a reference oh my god okay i have a plan so epi’s just gonna be like hey you know what you know what it’s fine i’ll do it she hasn’t seen my face she’s seen the disguise you will get out of here i’ll take care of it i i just put my hand up she’ll and say i’m sorry i don’t know what i’m sorry about but i’m sorry i’ll explain later i’ll look forward to it now get out of here all right assuming everyone else is okay with it i’m okay like brock will go with what the majority of the group says for leaving eppie to like stand sentinel on this if he has a point they haven’t been seen brooke also has not been seen maybe armbar and i just need to leave eppy’s the one who wants to save the magister so bad

oh right i don’t really want to care that much um i’m leaving with the majority claiming

i’m ready to get out of this here’s the thing we need to like make ourselves scarce we do you think felix knows a way to uh get the heat off of us if we just leave yes the best thing would do to me to ask felix do you know where felix is roll a perception [ __ ] yeah it’s probably around here somewhere um let’s see reception plus three seven you don’t see him i don’t see him so what else that’s right in my experience you only see felix when he wants to be seen so uh let’s just find a let’s just find a way out of here right i’ll try and look for a sneaky way you guys follow me and i’ll look out oh you know you know what the you know would be the sneakiest way out here actually it’s probably the sewer the sewer is practically a maze is there a sewer entrance nearby oh yeah is pretty much everywhere like not everywhere but you know you can typically get to the sewer from wherever you are okay yeah i actually also figure that’s the best way so come on guys into the poop tube ah crap

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